Neighborhood Hijinx Continued

So, fucking "Hep Head Bob" got a DUI the other night like a jackass. Lost his car, lost his license. He might even lose his job because he has no car. And the fuck was only half a mile away from home. He got so smashed watching a football game, that he got nailed on his way home. Then when he finally got home from the police station he realized that he left his cell phone in the back seat of the police cruiser that brought him home. So at 3:30 in the fucking morning he was knocking on my door because he needed a phone to call the police department to get his phone back. Do you see why I want to shit on his front door step? The best part is, the court looked back at all the other DUIs he has had and now he has to do a bid. He is going to have to spend 20 days in jail. Hopefully 20 days of beatings and forced sodomy. Actually he'd probably willingly blow somebody for protection. He'd just have to refer back to the skills he learned when he was younger. Or what he learned while he was in the Navy. HAHA!